Nothing’s Surprising – Bike Snob NYC

Additional to yesterday’s submit, various you felt I did certainly make a mistake by returning the Litespeed:

Truthfully, I’m unsure why that’s. Aside from driving superbly, being actually gentle, wanting prefer it simply got here out of the store yesterday although it’s like 25 years outdated, and naturally boasting maybe the best built-in shifting drivetrains ever produced, it actually had nothing a lot going for it.

Oh shit, I actually did make a mistake, didn’t I?

Fuck it, possibly there’s nonetheless time, I’m going out to lie in entrance of the UPS truck:

Simply kidding:

No, I’m snug with my determination. For one factor I’M A BIG BOY AND I DON’T NEED YOUR APPROVAL. (I’m not yelling at you, I’m yelling at myself, as a result of possibly if I yell loud sufficient I’ll truly imagine it.) For one more, I’ve bought this:

As a highway bike it’s every thing the Litespeed is, plus it matches gravel tires. Additionally, to be utterly sincere, I’m an excessive amount of of a dirtbag for a flowery titanium highway bike–even one which’s over 20 years outdated. And once more, I’ll remind you that if you happen to really need it I’m certain Paul at Basic Cycle could be joyful to promote it to you. I even upgraded the pawls within the Ksyriums!

There was nothing in any respect flawed with the outdated ones, however I learn that the reason for the dreaded Mavic Demise Squeal was that the pawls put on down and the particles degrades the bushing or one thing ridiculous, and that to forestall it you improve the pawls to the tougher ones from the mountain wheels or one thing. In order that’s what I did, although the bushing was simply high-quality. As a result of I’m neurotic.

As for my brace of Italian highway bikes, I stand by these as properly:

I really like the Cervino for the way in which it rides and the way in which it seems to be, however I additionally like it as a result of the snooty varieties don’t even take a look at it as a result of they see the “Nishiki” decal and the uncovered cables they usually assume I’m driving an outdated 10-speed I bought off Craigslist and never an Italian basic with Tremendous File:

[Via Craigslist]

On the similar time, I additionally get the satisfaction of being part of a really small and elite group of overenthusiastic Nishiki homeowners:

As for the Faggin, not solely is it satisfying to resurrect an outdated bike you’ve had for years, however it’s not a type of Italian names everybody fawns over simply because they’re alleged to, like Colnago, or Pinarello, or De Rosa, and even Pegorini–I imply Pegoretti:

Talking of stuff that’s not snooty, additional to Friday’s submit, astute readers famous that Mountain Bike Motion apparently revealed “The Surprising Fact!” in regards to the Ozark Path mountain bike from Walmart:

Right here’s the bike, which Walmart sells for $398:

Now, I could also be an city sophisticate with a fleet of unique bicycles in metrosexual hues, however I’ve by no means been one to sneer on the big-box shopper. For instance, when the Smugerati have been making enjoyable of Goal bikes, I identified how short-sighted and patronizing that was. I’ve additionally by no means shied from a cut price, and in 2019 I rode L’Eroica California on a cheap-ass highway bike from Chain Response which I had shipped proper to my resort earlier than the experience:

The bike was $323.99 and nonetheless got here in at underneath $400 even after the delivery prices:

The bike was nice, and I had no downside hanging with the pack of hotshot gravel influencers I used to be staying with in a media home. Right here I’m mentioning the rear:

That’s Gus Morton, Lachlan Morton’s brother, on the left:

Because the one individual with no fancy bike or a suntan, they handled me as if I used to be a Walmart bike that had taken human type.

Anyway, given my expertise with that highway bike, I suspected THE SHOCKING TRUTH! in regards to the Walmart mountain bike was that it was simply high-quality, and this video appears to substantiate that that is certainly the case:

In reality the reviewer’s solely actual challenge with it was the standard of the fork:

I do know I’m alleged to be joyful that Mountain Bike Motion is acknowledging an affordable bike from Walmart could be good, however I’m largely simply indignant that they didn’t level out that it could even be higher–and possibly cheaper–in the event that they didn’t hassle with the silly suspension fork. Like not a higher suspension fork, however no suspension fork in any respect. I imply why do you want a suspension fork to do that?

Then once more, I’m certain that in 2024 it’s completely inconceivable to promote a mountain bike with no suspension fork, even in Walmart, and so that you wind up paying extra for a clunky suspension fork that really makes the bike worse–a phenomenon I’ve additionally written about earlier than.

After all the business has since addressed the issue it created by promoting offroad-capable bikes with crappy suspension forks by inventing a brand new kind of offroad-capable bike you’re allowed to experience with no suspension fork (properly, a minimum of for now, anyway). This new kind of bicycle is named a “gravel bike,” and since a minimum of 2022 you too can get these inexpensively at Walmart:

Just like the Ozark Path, it appears to get fairly respectable evaluations on-line, although if you happen to’re keen to spend a little bit extra Walmart provides you with Head:

I’m genuinely fascinated by the Campy-ish L-Twoo shifters:

I’ll should get a pair for the Faggin:

And if you happen to’re a type of contrarian varieties who assume gravel bikes are simply how the business will get you to overpay for a cyclocross bike, properly guess what? Walmart will promote you a cyclocross bike too:

When you’re questioning, the reply is sure, you possibly can experience it at your subsequent UCI occasion:

Somebody at “Schwinn” is studying the UCI rule ebook.

And whereas everybody is aware of about Allied, it seems to be like now you can even get crabon bikes with GRX immediately from Walmart–or a minimum of immediately from Walmart’s web site (although I assume the corporate additionally sells them immediately):

To not point out a highway bike–with rim brakes!

Simply as all mountain bikes should have suspension forks, quickly all bicycles of any kind should be product of crabon. And if even the Walmart choices absolutely crabonify then possibly we’ll get to a bizarre inversion level the place the boutique metal bikes from unbiased corporations will price lower than the Walmart bikes.

Perhaps there’s hope for the long run.

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